115 The One With the Stoned Guy
Chandler升职了，他却不乐意。。。
Chandler: So, it's a typical day at work. I'm inputting my numbers,
and big Al calls me into his office and tells me he wants to make me processing supervisor.
All: That's great!
Chandler: So.... I quit.
WENUS: Weekly Estimated Net Usage Systems. A processing term.
Chandler: Can you see my nipples through this shirt?
Rachel: No. But don't worry, I'm sure they're still there.（哈哈）
"I don't have a dream" speech.哈哈。。。
Chandler: Hey, you guys in the living room all know what you want to do. You know, you have goals. You have dreams. I don't have a dream.
Ross: Ah, the lesser-known "I don't have a dream" speech.
结果还是抗不过高薪各种条件的轰炸
This is not a negotiation, this is a rejection! (Listens) No! No! No, stop saying numbers! I'm telling you, you've got the wrong guy! You've got the wrong guy! (Listens) I'll see you on Monday! (slams the phone down)
Ross新交了个女朋友，要他讲Dirty talk ,结果他不会，Joey教他，结果出现基情四射的一幕。。。哈哈哈。。。笑死。。。
Phoebe的按摩客户说要开餐厅，Monica兴奋极了，结果各种毁。。。

116，117 The One With Two Parts
Phoebe的双胞胎姐姐Ursula ，其实要不是先有了个电视剧mad about you的电视，可能就没有friends，要不是有个Ursula 就没有Phoebe。。
Joey喜欢上Ursula，话说刚开始是不是有意让Joey和Phoebe有那么点暧昧呢，呵。。。。
Chandler本来要开除一女员工，结果因为人家漂亮就那啥。。。
Ross和Carol参加助产班，又和Susan掐起来，。。。终于意识到自己要当爸，有点吓到。。。（猴子开始失控，玩遥控器把电视弄成了西班牙语的。。。）后来和他爸聊后，猴子吃了字母呛住了，经历了猴子事件，他终于有了爸爸的赶脚。。。。猴子握住他手那里好感人，真可爱。。。
Rachel 弄伤脚，去医院因为保险省钱问题用Monica的名字，结果遇到俩帅哥医生，互换名字后互损。。。这里还有乔治克鲁尼客串呢，
Carol没来，于是要有人扮演妈妈角色，抛硬币是Ross，结果就有了这么一幕喜剧十足的画面，笑死。。
Teacher: Good. Now imagine your vagina is opening like a flower.


118 The One With All The Poker
玩扑克，夹杂着Rachel找工作和Ross对她的情愫。。。。
这集有个经典场景，猴子真可爱，放CD，就爱那首The Lion Sleeps Tonight 然后他们三个跟着歌的那段真好玩。。。
各种关于玩扑克的对话
Rachel: Mmm-hmmm. Oh, so typical. Ooo,I'm a man. Ooo, I have a penis. Ooo, I have to win money to exert my power over women. (hands over her money)
Monica: You know what? This is not over. We will play you again, and
we will win, and you will lose, and you will beg, and we will laugh, and we will take every last dime you have, and you will hate yourselves forever.
(Ross comes back from bathroom.)
Ross: Alright. (to Rachel): Your money's mine, Green.
Rachel: Your fly is open, Geller.
Phoebe: You guys, you know what I just realized? 'Joker' is 'poker'
with a 'J.' Coincidence?
Chandler: Hey, that's... that's 'joincidence' with a 'C'!
Rachel : (Starts singing): Well, I have got your money, and you'll never see it...
(Ross stands up.)
Rachel: And your fly's still open...
(Ross looks down.)
Rachel: Ha, I made you look....

119 The One Where the Monkey Gets Away
Barry和Mindy 订婚了，Rachel有点小忧伤，Ross想趁Rachel帮他照看猴子跟他表白，结果猴子跑丢了，
Joey: Hey, I don't need violence to enjoy a movie. Just so long as
there's a little nudity.
Monica: There was nudity!
Joey: I meant female nudity. Alright? I don't need to see Lou Grant frolicking.
Monica and Phoebe: Hugh! Hugh Grant!
Rachel: Oh, I don't know. I guess it's not about no guys, it's about
the right guy,

120 The One With the Evil Orthodontist
风流牙医。。。
121 The One With The Fake Monica
Monica银行卡被偷用，
Monica: This is so unfair! She's got everything I want, and she doesn't have my mother.
她要去和假Monica上课见见那假Monica，Rachel和Phoebe劝她，然后Phoebe这段最经典了，就是我签名档那个


Phoebe: This is madness. It's madness, I tell you, for the love of God,
Monica, don't do it!! ...Thank you.
然后她们去学踢踏舞那，这段太好玩了，
其实假Monica说的那些就是人生苦短，及时行乐呗，但太极端了，盗用别人的钱财名字，
Ross的猴子发情了，必须要送走
Ross: She says Marcel's humping thing's not a phase. Apparently
he's reached sexual maturity.
Joey: (To Chandler) Hey! He beat ya.
猴子多可爱的，话说和加勒比海盗里的猴子似乎是一只耶，
Joey要取艺名
Chandler: How about Joey... Pepponi?
Joey: No, still too ethnic. My agent thinks I should have a name that's more neutral.
Chandler: Joey... Switzerland? （不是要中立点吗，哈哈）
后来Chandler开玩笑地说Joe Stalin吧，结果Joey不知道是在开玩笑，还真喜欢，
Joey: Joseph Stalin. I think you'd remember that!
Chandler: Oh yes! Bye Bye Birdie, starring Joseph Stalin. Joseph
Stalin is the Fiddler on the Roof.

122 the One With the Ick Factor
Phoebe教人家在家自己按摩，结果大家就不来了，
Phoebe: No, nothing like that. I was just...such a dummie. I taught
this "massage-yourself-at-home-workshop." And they are.
然后她去给Chandler当秘书，结果发现大家都不喜欢他，
Phoebe: Don't feel bad. You know they used to like you a lot. But
then you got promoted, and, you know, now you're like "Mr. Boss Man".
You know, Mr. Bing. Mr. Bing, "Boss Man Bing".
Chandler: They do me?
Phoebe: You know like... uh okay... uh... 'Could that report be any later?'
他们一起模仿他的说话方式，哈哈，笑死。。。
Monica交了个小男朋友，结果那小朋友才17岁。。。
Rahcel做梦，梦到几个男生，
Ross带着Beeper等着Carol生孩子呼他，
123 The One With the Birth
Carol要生孩子了，这集好有爱呀，
Ross和Susan吵起来了，被Carol赶出病房，在某个走廊2还在吵，路过的Phoebe把他们推进一间工具室教训他们，结果门锁上开不了了，后来在Phoebe的一番话下，他们终于不吵了，了解到俩个人都爱着孩子，后来都同意叫孩子Ben，还是因为Phoebe。。。


Joey碰到个孕妇，本来因不同球队球迷而吵起来，后来陪伴孕妇生孩子，还买气球默默拴在门上，唉，
Monica看到医院那么多人都有孩子，触景生情，也想要孩子，Chandler说，如果40岁我们俩还没结婚，就一起生一个吧，
124 The One Where Rachel Finds Out
Rachel过生日，Ross要去中国，拆生日礼物时Chandler说漏嘴，Rachel知道了Ross喜欢他，跑去机场追，没追上，
后来终于决定去接机，可是，。。。。。下季见

话说我玩贴吧那么久，都没加老友吧，lisa吧才加不久，真神奇，
貌似玩贴吧以来就是围着懒虫转。。。
现在除了偶尔打点酱油，真没什么好玩。。。
所以这俩天去老友吧逛。。。
今天看到个帖子，楼主说喜欢Phoebe和Joey，然后批判了Rachel，然后引起各种热议，那还是俩年前的帖子，这让我想到城吧以前有个帖子，说只喜欢BB走之前的西城，然后讨厌泥鸡，也是引起各种争论。。。
不同的一群人，类似的想法。。。
呵呵。。。。
——————————————————————
第一季，美腻的Phoebe，可是那时丽萨都30岁了，

201 The One With Ross' New Girlfriend
Ross从中国带了个女朋友回来，Rachel好伤心。。。Phoebe给Monica剪错了头发，哈哈。。。Chandler被Joey的裁缝吃豆腐了，哈哈哈哈。结果原来Joey全家都被吃了很久的豆腐。。。哈哈。笑死
RACHEL: These are, these aren't for you. (to Julie) These are for you. (Loudly, thinking she can't speak English.) Welcome to our
country.
JULIE: (Loudly, proving she can speak English.) Thank you. I'm from New York.
Rachel以为人家不会讲英语，哈哈，好玩
PHOEBE: Oh my god. This is huge. This is bigger than huge. This is like, all right, what's bigger than huge?
JOEY: Um, this?
PHOEBE: Yes.
哈哈，what’s bigger than huge ?
CHANDLER: He said, he said that they're having a great time. I'm sorry. But, the silver lining, if you wanna see it, is that he made the decision all by himself without any outside help whatsoever.
RACHEL: How is that the silver lining?
CHANDLER: You have to really wanna see it. 推卸责任中
ROSS: (on phone) Ok, ok, sweetheart, I'll see you later. Ok, bye. What? Oh, that is so sweet. No, no, ok, you hang up. Ok, ok, one, two, three. (motions for Rachel to be quiet) Well you didn't hang up either.
RACHEL: She didn't hang up either!
ROSS: Ok, no, no, you hang up. You, you, y--
RACHEL: (taking the phone and hanging it up) Sorry, I thought you were talking to me.
很经典的谁先挂电话。。挺贱的。。。（我这样想是因为我自己没这种吧）


PHOEBE: Would you relax? I know what I am doing. This is how he wears it.
MONICA: How who wears it? （哈哈，如果是汉语，你是不会知道这个Ta是男的女的）
PHOEBE: Demi Moore.
MONICA: Demi Moore is not a he.
PHOEBE: Well, he was a he in Arthur, and in Ten.
MONICA: That's Dudley Moore. I said I wanted it like Demi Moore.
PHOEBE: Oh, oh, oh my god!
MONICA: Oh my god!
PHOEBE: I'm sorry, I'm sorry. Which one's Demi Moore?
MONICA: She's the actress who was in Disclosure, Indecent Proposal, Ghost.
PHOEBE: Oh, she's got gorgeous hair.
MONICA: I KNOW! That’s why I wanted to look like her .
经典的 I KNOW。。。。哈哈
RACHEL: When I saw him get off that plane with her, I really thought I hit rock bottom. But today, it's like there's rock bottom, then 50 feet of crap, then me.
如果以学英语的态度来看的吧，你就学到了怎样形容你糟糕的心情。。。
Phoebe: come on , it’s not that bad. You never know. Bell bottoms came back.
ROSS: I like it. I do, I think it's a Ten.
MONICA: Thank you. My hair is very amused.
CHANDLER: Come on, Monica, things could be worse. You
could get caught between the moon and New York City. I know it's crazy, but
it's true.
话说没看那电影不知道这笑话有多好笑

203 The One Where Mr. Heckles Dies
Chandler 甩别人因为一些很小的事，比如鼻孔大，不喜欢雅尼，头大，但Janice大家都没异议，然后大家模仿Janice, Joey的最重口
CHANDLER: Ok, Janice. Janice. You gotta give me Janice.That wasn't about being picky.
ROSS: We'll give you Janice.
PHOEBE: I miss Janice though. "Hello, Chandler Bing."
RACHEL: "Oh, my, god."
JOEY: "Oh, Chandler, now, now, that's it. There, faster!"
Phoebe不相信进化论，不相信万有引力，让Ross很不爽
ROSS: You don't believe in evolution?
PHOEBE: I don't know, it's just, you know...monkeys,Darwin, you know, it's a, it's a nice story, I just think it's a little too easy.
CHANDLER: Uh-Oh. It's Isaac Newton, and he's pissed.Quick,Pheebs ,hop on the ceiling .
Ross各种讲都讲不过Phoebe，后来搬来一箱化石，结果又被Phoebe讲的哑口无言，真好玩
Phoebe：。。。。。。Now, are you telling me that you are so unbelievably arrogant that you can't admit that there's a teeny tiny possibility that you
could be wrong about this?
ROSS: There might be, .. .. a teeny,…. tiny, … possibility.
PHOEBE: I can't believe you caved.
ROSS: What?
PHOEBE: You just abandoned your whole belief system. I mean, before, I didn't agree with you, but at least I respected you. How, how, how are you going to go into work tomorrow? How, how are you going to face the other science guys? How, how are you going to face yourself? [Ross leave ]Oh! That was fun. So who's hungry?

楼下的Mr. Heckles 死了，他们得帮他整理遗物：满屋的杂乱
Chandler发现自己和年轻的Mr. Heckles一样，然后觉得自己也会孤独终老，觉得Janice是最后保障，结果Janice结婚怀孕了，
JANICE: Oh, sweetie, I'm sorry. I couldn't wait for you forever.
CHANDLER: You couldn't have told me about this on the phone?
JANICE: And what? Missed the expression on your face? Janice likes to have her fun.
RACHEL: Hey Chandler. Monica just broke my seashell lamp.
CHANDLER: Neat. I'm gonna die alone.
RACHEL: Ok, you win.
MONICA: Chandler, you're not gonna die alone.
CHANDLER: Janice was my safety net, ok? And now I have to
get a snake.
PHOEBE: Uh huh. Why is that?
CHANDLER: If I'm gonna be an old, lonely man, I'm gonnaneed a thing, you know, a hook, like that guy on the subway who eats his own face. So I figure I'll be Crazy Man with a Snake, y know. Crazy Snake Man. And I'll get more snakes, call them my babies, kids will walk past my place, they will run. "Run away from Crazy Snake Man," they'll shout!
Rachel 看到个奇怪的灯，搬回去用，Monica很不爽。。
MONICA: Hey, Rache. You know what we haven't played in a while?
RACHEL: What?
MONICA: Hide the Lamp.
RACHEL: Monica, let it go.
MONICA: Did you know I was allergic to shellfish?
RACHEL: Well, then, you'll just have to eat the other lamps.

202 The One With the Breast Milk
看着Carol喂奶，俩个小盆友不舒服了，Ross说be a growup,不懂可以发问，
ROSS: Look, would you guys grow up? That is the most natural beautiful thing in the world.
JOEY: Yeah, we know, but there's a baby suckin' on it.
CHANDLER: Carol, Carol? I was just wondering if Joey could ask you a question about breast-feeding?
CAROL: Sure.
JOEY: Uh, does it hurt?
CAROL: It did at first, but not anymore.
JOEY: Chandler?
CHANDLER: So, uh, how often can you do it?
CAROL: As much as he needs.
JOEY: Ok, I got one, I got one. If he blows into one, does the other one get bigger?
Joey秀下限

Julie邀她们去shopping，Phoebe找理由拒绝，又奇葩了

PHOEBE: I can't, I have to take my grandmother to the vet.
CHANDLER: Come on, you're going to Bloomingdales with Julie? That's like cheating on Rachel in her house of worship.
如果你和Julie去Bloomingdales shopping，就像在Rachel家偷她汉子，哈哈，对于Rachel来说，shopping是件灰常严肃的事
MONICA: I don't know what else to say.
RACHEL: Well that works out good, because I'm not listening.
MONICA: I feel terrible, I really do.
RACHEL: Oh, I'm sorry, did my back hurt your knife?
Monica道歉，Rachel不领情
这段演的好好，也好好玩，你可以说好好的友情，你可以说是奇怪的友情。。。
Joey的卖古龙水，Bijan for men / Hombre

204 The One With Phoebe's Husband
Phoebe居然结婚了，但至少为了帮那个GAY拿绿卡，结果那人居然不是GAY，怎么刚好和Ross反过来了。。。
互爆秘密，Chandler居然有第三个nipple，Joey居然拍过****，
Ross还没和Julie真正那啥，他像Rachel讨教，Rachel想破坏他们那晚，结果后来不忍心，倒帮了忙。。。
205 The One With Five Steaks and an Eggplant
这集好心酸，很感同身受，关于钱的问题，