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我一句句帮你分析:
These years, universities play an important role in proving jobs.
首先这是Chinglish,"这些年来,大学在证明职业上扮演重要角色."中文通顺吗?其次proving应该是providing,但是大学是不提供职业的,题目也没有讲大学是否提供职业,既是废话也是偏题,还不如不写这句.
Therefor, whether universities should accept equal gender students have became a hot topic.
首先therefore,第二本句依然chinglish,什么事equal gender students? 请不要再用中文直译成英文这种方式来写作文,就算你写10000句也是错10000句, 正确的说法应该是 equal number of students with different gender, 按照题目改写就行了,不要自己创造怪异的词组.
Some of people agree with that each subjects had ignore gender problems. However, others dont think so. As I considered I support the first view.
首先some of people是错的,some people, 后半句each subjects had ignore gender problems又是严重chinglish, 这话没人能看得懂,"每个课程都忽略了性别问题?"课程如何忽略问题?中文通顺吗? 正确的说法应该是the gender equity has been ignored in many subjects in higher education.
However, others dont think so. 这是严重的口语化语句,不要再用. 其次dont在雅思大作文里不要出现,要用do not, 正确说法可以是: However, others may object to this argument.
"As I considered I support the first view."这又是chinglish, 英语里不是这么说的, In my opinion,I will support the first argument rather than the other one.
总结:你的问题很严重,chinglish每句都是,建议不要先写雅思真题,老老实实回去做语法题,背单词词组,基础积累好了再来写作文,否则等错误越写越熟练再要改就来不及了
These years, universities play an important role in proving jobs.
首先这是Chinglish,"这些年来,大学在证明职业上扮演重要角色."中文通顺吗?其次proving应该是providing,但是大学是不提供职业的,题目也没有讲大学是否提供职业,既是废话也是偏题,还不如不写这句.
Therefor, whether universities should accept equal gender students have became a hot topic.
首先therefore,第二本句依然chinglish,什么事equal gender students? 请不要再用中文直译成英文这种方式来写作文,就算你写10000句也是错10000句, 正确的说法应该是 equal number of students with different gender, 按照题目改写就行了,不要自己创造怪异的词组.
Some of people agree with that each subjects had ignore gender problems. However, others dont think so. As I considered I support the first view.
首先some of people是错的,some people, 后半句each subjects had ignore gender problems又是严重chinglish, 这话没人能看得懂,"每个课程都忽略了性别问题?"课程如何忽略问题?中文通顺吗? 正确的说法应该是the gender equity has been ignored in many subjects in higher education.
However, others dont think so. 这是严重的口语化语句,不要再用. 其次dont在雅思大作文里不要出现,要用do not, 正确说法可以是: However, others may object to this argument.
"As I considered I support the first view."这又是chinglish, 英语里不是这么说的, In my opinion,I will support the first argument rather than the other one.
总结:你的问题很严重,chinglish每句都是,建议不要先写雅思真题,老老实实回去做语法题,背单词词组,基础积累好了再来写作文,否则等错误越写越熟练再要改就来不及了
