遥想当年毕业工作,投身三次元,一狠心就退出了所有贴吧和QQ群之类的网络社交圈。那时还是不辞而别默默遁走的,一是怕告辞矫情,二是怕留恋不舍就走不掉。人啊,果然是经历多了,心就淡了,如今回想,倒也没啥纠结了,只剩下唏嘘浩叹。不知不觉间,为自己的生活奔波忙碌,就已经许多年了,少白头都更加严重了。虽然人还未老,但一种苍老的心态却莫名地袭上心头。
玩游戏,好像跟着剧情和人物经历了一辈子。玩贴吧,好像与大家一起走过兴废生死,走到荒凉的时间尽头。读小说看影视也一样。这些都好像我在二次元也有生命,度过了一次又一次的人生,体验着一回又一回的生老病亡。心,原来就是就这样跟着老的。当我在现实中摸爬滚打了许久,蓦然回首,那些二次元的一辈子又一辈子,都变得若隐若现恍如隔世,那些曾经的人和物和事,都已沧海桑田变幻无常了。这让我感受到一种轮回的迷蒙与失落,又加重了心态的苍老。总之,一切的悲欢离合,都结束了远去了,就会留下不尽的感叹。我会哭,笑着哭,百感交集。魔戒片尾曲《Into The West》:
Lay down,Your sweet and weary head
Night is falling,You have come to journeys end
Sleep now,And dream of the ones who came before
They are calling,From across the distant shore
Why do you weep
What are these tears upon your face
Soon you will see,All of your fears will pass away
safe in my arms,You are only sleeping
What can you see,On the horizon
Why do the white gulls call
Across the sea,A pale moon rises
The ships have come to carry you home
Dawn will turn,To silver glass
A light on the water,All souls pass
Hope fades,Into the world of night,Through shadows falling,Out of memory and time
Dont say,We have come now to the end
White shores are calling,You and I will meet again
And youll be here in my arms,Just sleeping
What can can you see,On the horizon
Why do the white gulls call
Across the sea,A pale moon rises
The ships have come to carry you home
And all will turn,To silver glass
A light on the water,Grey ships pass,Into the west