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请大家帮我改一改我的破阵子(辛弃疾)的翻译。

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破阵子(辛弃疾)
醉里挑灯看剑,
Drunk with the lamp on, I was watching the glaive.
梦回吹角连营。
In a trance, I felt like flashing back to the military days.
八百里分麾下炙,
Roast beef was distributed among the soldiers.
五十弦翻塞外声。
Majestic military songs were played from instruments.
沙场秋点兵。
I was there, inspecting troops in the fall.
马作的卢飞快,
On gallant Dilu horse, running full speed,
弓如霹雳弦惊。
The arrow shoot off with twanging bows.
了却君王天下事,
I was to complete the great task of monarch,
赢得生前身后名。
And to win an honored reputation in life and afterlife.
可怜白发生。
But waking up, I am already a hoary man.


IP属地:北京1楼2022-12-22 17:22回复
    我觉得你翻译的基本都对,但是并不是没有问题。我去查了查许老的译文,“了却君王天下事”最好还是把内容翻译出来吧,要不然看不懂这是什么意思,还需要读者去查。毕竟这是要当做写给外国人看的。不过总的来说翻译的不错,加油吧!


    来自手机贴吧2楼2022-12-29 17:55
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