Max Factor mascara makes eyelashes appear three times longer? Max Factor should make condoms.
蜜丝佛陀睫毛膏拉长效果可达三倍~
蜜丝佛陀应该去生产避孕套。

What's the most sensitive part of your body when you're having a wank? Your ears.
打飞机的时候身体最敏感的部位是哪里？
耳朵。
这个为什么？求科普

Why did the sperm cross the road? Because I put on the wrong socks before I went for a walk.
为什么精子会过马路？
因为我出来溜达的时候穿错袜子了。
再求科普。

You may hate paedophiles...but at least they drive slowly when passing schools.
你可以讨厌恋童癖，但是起码人家开车经过学校还知道减速。

Statistics say women think they are smarter than men because they can fake orgasms for the relationship. Men say, "Big ****ing deal, try faking a relationship just for the shag!"
数据表明女性认为自己比男性更聪明
因为她们懂得在恋爱中装高？潮~
男人说：还以为多大本事，劳资为了高？潮还装恋爱呢。

那看来我还真是英国人性格。
我在学校生气了肯定也会上贴吧微博乱写一通。。。

这么好的帖子！诶诶……现在才看到……